![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
suzyscottdotcomI’ve had quite a few bad times recently, as you may well have noticed from reading my diary. At least once or twice a week, I’m getting upset. Depressed. Anxious. Whatever. You may wonder what I’ve got to be depressed about, but for some reason, it just keeps happening. Post-op depression seems to hit most (trans)people.
On Sunday, we’d gone into Cambridge with our two visitors… and I had a headache, but I was sure that it would pass again. It did, after more painkillers. When I got home a few hours later, I went for a lie-down… and then, waking up, I felt bad. A lot of the root problems have been resolved, or improved, but I still get rather anxious and upset quite a lot. I talked about it with C last night, and I agreed to go to the doc this morning and explain all. Indeed, even when taking the new pills given, I’ve not slept properly two out of the last four nights. Last night, I barely slept at all, even with a ‘maximum’ dose of two pills.
The point is, I’ve been (re?)started on anti-depressants, namely Citalopram (citalopram hydrobromide), which is very similar to the ESCitalopram that I was taking last year (oxalate) – well, as far as I can see. They are both SSRI’s, which work over time, etc. It’s not going to improve things immediately, but it’s a start. And yes, I started on the other ones on 8th February last year – one year and ten days ago. Anyway, point of mentioning this, is that I’m on the same dose as I was before for the first ten days [10mg], then that will be doubled. (This derivative can go up to 60mg/day he said, but I did feel a bit woozy at the thought…!)
In brief, the doc suggests taking these for around six months, at least. I took that ‘anxiety/depression’ test again – a fortnight ago, I think the scores were 11 and 3 out of 21. Today, they were 16/21 for anxiety, 11/21 for depression. Ouch.
Additionally, and not related to the ouch, my records have (partially) arrived from Dundee. 15 sides of A4… now I really feel ill…
Lots of other things I need to blog about too, but for the moment, this is one year to the day since I first saw Caroline in the flesh. The moment I first laid eyes on her… slipping back out of gear at the traffic lights, and listening to the Ka breaks going ‘SCREEEEECCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH’… it got much better from there! As you will no doubt see from the above, I’d be genuinely a lot worse off without her. We fell in love on 31st March, so we have a little while before we are one year together, all going well.
(So, given that I got very little sleep last night, I’m not at work this afternoon. With a bit of luck, normal service can resume tomorrow.)
On Sunday, we’d gone into Cambridge with our two visitors… and I had a headache, but I was sure that it would pass again. It did, after more painkillers. When I got home a few hours later, I went for a lie-down… and then, waking up, I felt bad. A lot of the root problems have been resolved, or improved, but I still get rather anxious and upset quite a lot. I talked about it with C last night, and I agreed to go to the doc this morning and explain all. Indeed, even when taking the new pills given, I’ve not slept properly two out of the last four nights. Last night, I barely slept at all, even with a ‘maximum’ dose of two pills.
The point is, I’ve been (re?)started on anti-depressants, namely Citalopram (citalopram hydrobromide), which is very similar to the ESCitalopram that I was taking last year (oxalate) – well, as far as I can see. They are both SSRI’s, which work over time, etc. It’s not going to improve things immediately, but it’s a start. And yes, I started on the other ones on 8th February last year – one year and ten days ago. Anyway, point of mentioning this, is that I’m on the same dose as I was before for the first ten days [10mg], then that will be doubled. (This derivative can go up to 60mg/day he said, but I did feel a bit woozy at the thought…!)
In brief, the doc suggests taking these for around six months, at least. I took that ‘anxiety/depression’ test again – a fortnight ago, I think the scores were 11 and 3 out of 21. Today, they were 16/21 for anxiety, 11/21 for depression. Ouch.
Additionally, and not related to the ouch, my records have (partially) arrived from Dundee. 15 sides of A4… now I really feel ill…
Lots of other things I need to blog about too, but for the moment, this is one year to the day since I first saw Caroline in the flesh. The moment I first laid eyes on her… slipping back out of gear at the traffic lights, and listening to the Ka breaks going ‘SCREEEEECCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH’… it got much better from there! As you will no doubt see from the above, I’d be genuinely a lot worse off without her. We fell in love on 31st March, so we have a little while before we are one year together, all going well.
(So, given that I got very little sleep last night, I’m not at work this afternoon. With a bit of luck, normal service can resume tomorrow.)
