New 2007 Fleetlists

Newly updated to scotbus.com are a selection of twenty new Scottish bus fleetlists. These are available in both Excel and PDF formats.

Many thanks to Chris Forbes for supplying these.

Over three thousand people have downloaded these lists on each of the two previous editions. The older versions can also still be had online.

Go to http://scotbus.com or http://www.scotbus.com, and click on "Fleetlists".

Dundee City Roadworks

One for the long-suffering passengers, but there are to be two seperate sets of works, starting on the same day next week.

From Monday 8th January 2007, for approx. 11 months, bus stops in Dock Street (near Tayside House) will be closed, to allow work on the Dock Street rail tunnel.

From Monday 8th January 2007, for approx. 4 weeks, bus stops in High Street, Whitehall Street and Union Street will be affected. Bus stops H1 and H2 will be relocated to Whitehall Crescent. Buses accessing the High Street will have to use West Marketgait and Yeaman Shore.

Bus stops in Whitehall Street and Nethergate will be suspended, and passengers should board/alight in Nethergate. See the posters for full details of the closure.

Once this work is complete, “Phase 2” will start (expected to be on Monday 5th February 2007, for approx. 8 weeks), and this will result in bus stops in Union Street being suspended. Passengers should use the stops at Nethergate instead. See the posters for full details of the closure.

I've put the poster, and most of the above information, on the Techpark microsite.

Hacked Chip and PIN terminal plays Tetris

Found this story via El Reg...

UK researchers have hacked a supposedly tamper-proof Chip and PIN terminal to allow it to play Tetris. Steven Murdoch and Saar Drimer of the University of Cambridge managed to get a playable version of the classic game working on the tiny screen.

The proof-of-concept hack highlights wider security concerns about the terminals even though it was only possible after Murdoch and Drimer replaced most of the internal electronics after opening up the terminal. The attack illustrates the possibility that hackers might be able to physically modify terminals for far more malign purposes.

Entertainingly Murdoch and Drimer have made a short video of the attack, which they released via YouTube.

The beauty of budget airlines

As posted to AD2-jokers earlier...

Attendant: Welcome aboard Sir. May I see your ticket?

Passenger: Sure.

Attendant: You're in seat 12B. That will be £2 please

Passenger: What for ?

Attendant: For telling you where to sit.

Passenger: But I already knew where to sit.

Attendant: Nevertheless, we are now charging a seat-locator fee of £2. It's the airline's new policy.

Passenger: That's the craziest thing I ever heard of. I won't pay it.

Attendant: Sir, do you want a seat on this flight, or not?

Passenger: Yes, yes. All right, I'll pay.

Attendant: Thank you. My goodness, your carry-on bag looks heavy. Would you like me to stow it in the overhead compartment for you ?

Passenger: That would be swell, thanks.

Attendant: No problem (grunts). Up we go, and done! That will be £3, please.

Passenger: What?

Attendant: The airline now charges a £3 carry-on assistance fee.

Passenger: This is extortion. I won't stand for it.

Attendant: Actually, you're right - you can't stand. You need to sit, and fasten your seat belt. We're about to push back from the gate. But first I need that £3.

Passenger: No way.

Attendant: Sir, if you don't comply, I will be forced to call the Air Marshal. And you really don't want me to do that.

Passenger: Why not? Is he going to shoot me?

Attendant: No, but there's a £10 Air Marshal hailing fee.

Passenger: Oh, all right, here - take the £3. I can't believe this.

Attendant: Thank you for your cooperation, sir. Is there anything else I can do for you?

Passenger: Yes. It's stuffy in here, and my overhead fan doesn't seem to work. Can you fix it?

Attendant: Your overhead fan is not broken, sir. Just insert two 50 pence coins into the overhead coin slot for the first five minutes.

Passenger: The airline is charging me for cabin air?

Attendant: Of course not, sir. Stagnant cabin air is provided free of charge. It's the circulating air that is charged for.

Passenger: I don't have any fifty pence. Can you change a two pound coin?

Attendant: Certainly, sir! Here you go!

Passenger: But you've given me only three fifty pence pieces for my two pounds.

Attendant: Yes, there's a change-making fee of 50 pence.

Passenger: Crying out loud. All I have left is a lousy 50 pence. Whatever will I do with it?

Attendant: Hang on to it. You'll need it later for the lavatory.

When this happens

You know that feeling when you are a bit tired, you can't doze off, you can't sleep, and you lie there, thinking, and you end up in tears and shaking a bit, the longer you are there?

No?

Well I just found it...