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I’ve had a lot to think about in the last few weeks. Some of these things I honestly never thought I’d see the time come, and mixed feelings and emotions, but I am good overall.
Firstly, pills. As I have mentioned several times before, I have to come off the Duphaston (Dydrogesterone), whether I like it or not, as it’s been discontinued by the manufacturer. So, I’ve started phasing myself off it gently, by cutting some of my remaining stock in half. I will hopefully try other things in time, but I want a clean break first. Lets see if this was really behind some of my feelings, or the Estradiol Valarate instead. I don’t expect to feel hugely different by stopping it in this way.
Secondly, feelings. Since this post, it’s been brought to my attention that Claire died in her sleep peacefully, after a heart attack. Now, no matter how many choice words had to say about me, I don’t think that she deserved to die, not right now, not far from her (45th I think) birthday.
Thirdly, new ventures. I never thought I’d say that the book was finished (see this post) but it is, and in the final stages of checking. I’d like to have it for sale by the end of the month, so keep watching! There are other projects in mind, and I’ve already had C suggesting a complimenting volume for down here… seriously!
Finally, despite the three things above, here is something I thought I’d never say. From the end of September (this Autumn), I’m going to be a student - for the first time since I left school (aside from the NVQ's I got about twelve years ago)! Full-time equivalent in open learning, and starting on a few Level 1 computing units. By the time I get my teeth into it, I can choose which of the qualifications I’d like to put that towards, and then go from there over the coming years.
Now, that will give me stability, something to work towards, and a pattern, as well as a bit more of an existence to my life. So, why this, why now? Well, health is a main thing, so this is flexible, as well as not requiring a daily commute! Caroline is supporting and encouraging me for the longer term, so I see this once again as good. The time frame being just over two months away, gives me time to finally continue with moving out of my current place in Dundee. Educational feelings from the past – well, I wanted to get out of school, move away, and become the person I knew I really was. Now, some things have not changed – I’ve done this. I’m settling in. I’ve got support, and friends on both sides of the border (and the Atlantic!). Now that is all out of the way, who knows?
The previously referred to interview didn’t go as planned, but I’ve managed to top that in fairly spectacular style, don’t you think?
So, what else? We had Caroline’s sister-in-law staying down with us on Thursday night, en route to a meditation weekend in deepest Suffolk. Yesterday I was out and about, will write about that later on.
Additionally, at the weekend, I used iTunes to purchase (the whole album, not just the single) Breakaway by Kelly Clarkson (a few of her songs have some wonderful lyrical meanings to me, as previously mentioned here), and some old school stuff too!
Firstly, pills. As I have mentioned several times before, I have to come off the Duphaston (Dydrogesterone), whether I like it or not, as it’s been discontinued by the manufacturer. So, I’ve started phasing myself off it gently, by cutting some of my remaining stock in half. I will hopefully try other things in time, but I want a clean break first. Lets see if this was really behind some of my feelings, or the Estradiol Valarate instead. I don’t expect to feel hugely different by stopping it in this way.
Secondly, feelings. Since this post, it’s been brought to my attention that Claire died in her sleep peacefully, after a heart attack. Now, no matter how many choice words had to say about me, I don’t think that she deserved to die, not right now, not far from her (45th I think) birthday.
Thirdly, new ventures. I never thought I’d say that the book was finished (see this post) but it is, and in the final stages of checking. I’d like to have it for sale by the end of the month, so keep watching! There are other projects in mind, and I’ve already had C suggesting a complimenting volume for down here… seriously!
Finally, despite the three things above, here is something I thought I’d never say. From the end of September (this Autumn), I’m going to be a student - for the first time since I left school (aside from the NVQ's I got about twelve years ago)! Full-time equivalent in open learning, and starting on a few Level 1 computing units. By the time I get my teeth into it, I can choose which of the qualifications I’d like to put that towards, and then go from there over the coming years.
Now, that will give me stability, something to work towards, and a pattern, as well as a bit more of an existence to my life. So, why this, why now? Well, health is a main thing, so this is flexible, as well as not requiring a daily commute! Caroline is supporting and encouraging me for the longer term, so I see this once again as good. The time frame being just over two months away, gives me time to finally continue with moving out of my current place in Dundee. Educational feelings from the past – well, I wanted to get out of school, move away, and become the person I knew I really was. Now, some things have not changed – I’ve done this. I’m settling in. I’ve got support, and friends on both sides of the border (and the Atlantic!). Now that is all out of the way, who knows?
The previously referred to interview didn’t go as planned, but I’ve managed to top that in fairly spectacular style, don’t you think?
So, what else? We had Caroline’s sister-in-law staying down with us on Thursday night, en route to a meditation weekend in deepest Suffolk. Yesterday I was out and about, will write about that later on.
Additionally, at the weekend, I used iTunes to purchase (the whole album, not just the single) Breakaway by Kelly Clarkson (a few of her songs have some wonderful lyrical meanings to me, as previously mentioned here), and some old school stuff too!
